At some point today, I will be picking up my race packet for my second 5k. It has nothing to do with the charity it supports. It isn’t because it is the cool thing to do. I just want to be there. I want to run. And that’s weird to me. So far from who I have always been.
As a kid, I definitely wasn’t the fastest. Remember my hero worship of the tortoise? I was always the one willing to sit on the sidelines so everyone else could play.
I tried out for school basketball teams twice. The first time, I was a little disappointed when I didn’t see my name on any of the team lists. The second time, I was crushed when the coaches told me not to even come back to tryouts. I was done with sports.
I joined the band, instead. And was overjoyed when I found out that marching took the place of my P.E. credit in high school. Extremely hard work and more time on my feet in the hot sun than I ever wanted. Disillusioned. But I got to hide in my bright red uniform that matched everyone else. Just one little part of a line. (My years in band were some of the greatest in my life. The relationships that were formed made high school for this shy kid. And the skills I learned have come in handy, too).
So, how did I end up here? Waiting in excitement for race day. For a race that I am, for now, still unable to run.
I believe I have the ladies of The View to thank for this, (I know. Go ahead and laugh), and a segment they did on some ladies that had lost a bunch of weight. I remember laughing at the woman who ran a marathon. I looked at my mom and said, “she can keep her marathon. I’ll find another way to lose it.” And then came that little tiny thought. Why can’t I do that?
Through the years, there have been a lot of false starts. Lots of early mornings at one park or another, followed by lots of busyness and binge eating. I’d give up, and then start again.
To motivate myself to try again, I signed up for my first 5k in August. I walked until the finish line was in sight. And I fell in love. With running. With the race day atmosphere. With getting up each day and redefining my impossible.